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Citation Station: Don't Step On The Towel

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  1.  
    • CommentAuthorButtPain
    • CommentTimeMay 2nd 2007
     

    Eastern Bulgarian woman found locked in her bathroom after missing 4 days of work.

    - - - - - -
    22 Year old woman, Elisaveta Bisera Karliman found in a mental state clutching a white cotton woven towel between her sallow white fingers in her Melnik home of Bulgaria. When family came to confront her about her 'not working',
    she only chanted to them relentlessly, 'Don't step on The Towel.'

    After 3 members of her family convinced her that nobody would step on the towel, they picked her up and laid her in the tub with the window open for the breeze to cool her down.
    Once she was calm and quite, two members casually left her side and went back to their duties.
    The one watching over her (aunt) was trying to get her to eat some of her hummus she'd been eating from her wooden spoon when suddenly Elisaveta began to cry blue colored tears.
    Her aunt began to bless her with fear and called for help. She stopped and turned to go find somebody, as she ran out of the bath room she tumbled to the floor and yipped and did not move.
    She then crawled into fetal position and grabbed a clean towel from a basket near her.
    When this womans brother came back to check up on the first girl he shriek at what had happened.
    All that the aunt would say was, 'Don't step On The Towel' ...

    And this happend to that man and then the next two others who checked on them. They each fell to the floor after stepping on a towel and they each told the next one to not step on the towel. They wouldn't stand and they only chanted that one sentence. When doctors seek them the next day, they were all fine, but the first girl was dehydrated and the aunt was actually poisoned by her hummus. That explained why she saw purple tears coming from her nieces dark blue eyes. But as for the whole, don't step on the towel chant. That was all just because of Elisaveta. She claimed that she had a 'vision' and that she saw them all laying on the floor after stepping on the towel. Mind you that they did not slip, they just tumbled by their selves, there body purposely did this for reasons we don't know.
    Other members of the family blame Transvestite Gypsy - Bulgarian Pop Star, 'Azis'.
    Today they are fine and living their normal lives as they did before the strange week long incident.

    I blame the water... I think somebody totally dropped some acid into it....
    actually I really don't know.. What do you think caused such a random and odd incident?

    Inbreeding maybe?

    •  
      CommentAuthorUdoboy
    • CommentTimeMay 2nd 2007
     

    This is clearly the work of Nimro Klims or one of his associates.

  3.  
    Posted By: Udoboy

    This is clearly the work of Nimro Klims or one of his associates.

    Why must you poke the fire?

    •  
      CommentAuthorAthene
    • CommentTimeMay 2nd 2007
     

    It's painfully obvious that Klims was involved somehow, GBTB.

  5.  

    Gift is Dutch for poison.

  6.  
    Posted By: Athene

    It's painfully obvious that Klims was involved somehow, GBTB.

    I never said he wasn't. He is involved in everything, so why does it need to be stated?

    • CommentAuthorBlina
    • CommentTimeMay 2nd 2007 edited
     
    Posted By: Udoboy

    This is clearly the work of Nimro Klims or one of his associates.

    Nimro Klims is come from Georgia.
    And, it would make sense after all
    because he has a huge anger for Gypsy Bulgarian Pop stars!
    It was truly part work of Klims and Bulgarian Pop star.
    :cool:

    I wonder if this also had anything to do with a llama?
    Buttpain? ... lol ... do you know if there was a llama involved in ANY way possible?
    I only say this because Klims has a terrible background with llama and well,
    he has learned to hex their milk... the only way you can tell if your carton
    has been hexed is if you tilt it in the light and see the carton has changed bluish with orange specks.
    Then you truly know that you are drinking hexed llama milk.... I know it sounds crazy but this is what I read
    from another meeting. I was a guest at their club! But they didn't accept me though...:cry:

    • CommentAuthor5010
    • CommentTimeMay 2nd 2007 edited
     
    Posted By: ButtPain

    What do you think caused such a random and odd incident?

    Inbreeding maybe?

    It may seem odd to you only because such incidents are underreported. Consider:

    - There is a game called NetHack that includes a cursed towel. The game designer obviously must have had a similar experience in order to even think of such an item.

    - There is also mention of an evil towel in episode 508 of South Park, a show that was known for openly depicting situations that people are too embarrassed to report.

    The theory behind this is summed up in a paper by Kenneth Bloom Sterling Stein Shlomo Argamon called "Appraisal Extraction for News Opinion Analysis at NTCIR-6". (full source here)

    Excerpt:
    "Appraisal Theory is a grammatical theory dealing with how opinion is represented in text. The attitude system classifies evaluative language into three general types of opinions: affect (an internal emotional state), appreciation (of intrinsic qualities of an object), or judgment (concerning the way people behave). English grammar imposes different constraints on how these three types of appraisal can be expressed. One cannot, for example, talk about “an evil towel” very easily because “evil” is a type of judgment, but a towel is an object that does not have behaviors (unless anthropomorphized)."

  9.  

    I have a good towel. So did Ford Prefect

    •  
      CommentAuthorAthene
    • CommentTimeMay 2nd 2007 edited
     

    Towels are very important... I love my big fluffy towels.

    • CommentAuthorBlina
    • CommentTimeMay 3rd 2007
     

    I'm afraid at this, I've also heard of Azis... the bulgarian pop star and frankly I find him very amusing.
    I don't think he had ANYTHING to do with this. This is clearly the work of Klims and ONLY he.
    That's my take anyway.

    • CommentAuthorBlina
    • CommentTimeMay 4th 2007
     
    Posted By: Athene

    Towels are very important... I love my big fluffy towels.

    Omg! So do I! They are a very important matter to this world, I most agree with you :bigsmile:

    • CommentAuthorButtPain
    • CommentTimeMay 12th 2007
     
    Posted By: Blina

    I'm afraid at this, I've also heard of Azis... the bulgarian pop star and frankly I find him very amusing.
    I don't think he had ANYTHING to do with this. This is clearly the work of Klims and ONLY he.
    That's my take anyway.

    Uhhh??
    Are you joking about Nimro Klims? is he real?
    :neutral:

    • CommentAuthorButtPain
    • CommentTimeMay 12th 2007
     
    Posted By: 5010
    Posted By: ButtPain

    What do you think caused such a random and odd incident?

    Inbreeding maybe?

    It may seem odd to you only because such incidents are underreported. Consider:

    - There is a game called NetHack that includes acursed towel. The game designer obviously must have had a similar experience in order to even think of such an item.

    - There is also mention of anevil towelin episode 508 ofSouth Park, a show that was known for openly depicting situations that people are too embarrassed to report.

    The theory behind this is summed up in a paper by Kenneth Bloom Sterling Stein Shlomo Argamon called "Appraisal Extraction for News Opinion Analysis at NTCIR-6". (full sourcehere)

    Excerpt:
    "Appraisal Theory is a grammatical theory dealing with how opinion is represented in text. The attitude system classifies evaluative language into three general types of opinions: affect (an internal emotional state), appreciation (of intrinsic qualities of an object), or judgment (concerning the way people behave). English grammar imposes different constraints on how these three types of appraisal can be expressed.One cannot, for example, talk about “an evil towel” very easily because “evil” is a type of judgment, but a towel is an object that does not have behaviors (unless anthropomorphized)."

    :surprised:
    WOW.
    I had no Idea....so scared

    • CommentAuthorBlina
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2007
     
    Posted By: ButtPain
    Posted By: Blina

    I'm afraid at this, I've also heard of Azis... the bulgarian pop star and frankly I find him very amusing.
    I don't think he had ANYTHING to do with this. This is clearly the work of Klims and ONLY he.
    That's my take anyway.

    Uhhh??
    Are you joking about Nimro Klims? is he real?
    :neutral:

    No. I am not.
    I am NOT joking. :confused:
    :shamed:

    •  
      CommentAuthorPaulustrious
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2007 edited
     

    What goes around...(Try the 07 May post)

    Well worth reading a 'Nimro Klims' Google. Alternatively this will do.

    •  
      CommentAuthorcritdragon
    • CommentTimeJun 4th 2007
     

    there is no such thing as nimro klims lol

    •  
      CommentAuthorcmseagle
    • CommentTimeJun 4th 2007
     

    You will not wake up tomorrow.

    •  
      CommentAuthorTrance
    • CommentTimeJun 4th 2007
     

    Or the day after, for that matter.

    •  
      CommentAuthorcritdragon
    • CommentTimeJun 4th 2007
     

    lol.. well i may just be very tired for two days..

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