We find out greatest strength through our worst weaknesses.

Posted By: Paulustrious

I can't understand why He even made the Earth, unless he was bored and had this massive ego thing going.

Why do you make poetry?

Posted By: Trance

Posted By: Paulustrious

I can't understand why He even made the Earth, unless he was bored and had this massive ego thing going.

Why do you make poetry?

Cus I'm bored and I have this massive ego thing going.

Ignore

What does Paul feed it?
His want to show everyone his impressive knowledge of dairy animals?
Or how about the time he battled Saddam Hussein on top of the White House with a rubber hose and wearing nothing but two salmons?

Posted By: Cody56

and wearing nothing but two salmons?

It was one salmon; that other one wasn't a salmon.

They're messing with you just for the hallibut.

Uh oh. Athene's baiting us. Time to crawl back into my shell.

Posted By: [Expletive Deleted]

Uh oh. Athene's baiting us. Time to crawl back into my shell.

You're such a smart bass... Cod you be serious for once?

p.s. If I so much as think I'm going to hear the Boston scrod story in this thread, you're getting smited, Taed.

Radio waves?

Get a decent tuna, sweetlips. Mullet over.

Yes, you hold it in place with Comb Jelly.

God is a jelly monster.....

Discuss.

One day a group of scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him.

The scientist walked up to God and said, “God, we’ve decided that we no longer need you. We’re to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don’t you just go on and get lost.”

God listened very patiently and kindly to the man and after the scientist was done talking, God said, “Very well, how about this, let’s say we have a man-making contest.” To which the scientist replied, “OK, great!”

But God added, “Now, we’re going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam.”

The scientist said, “Sure, no problem” and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt.

God just looked at him and said, “No, no, no. You go get your own dirt.”

I find it easier to call myself an atheist in Canada than the USA. I wonder why?

Burma looks ripe for a little unrest. I had a friend who lived as a Burmese monk for a few years.

Posted By: Fact totum

Dubyah.

Wash your mouth out with soap, for using such a filthy word.

Who wants to be the super Christian and battle any atheist in a thread flame war that will ultimately result in Legat being very pissed off?! Anybody?

I can't watch Youtube on my laptop.
It just brings up the source code.

Doesn't seem like Legat got very pissed off. We've actually kept it pretty civil, I think.

---

The Nine Satanic Statements

from The Satanic Bible, ©1969
by Anton Szandor LaVey

1. Satan represents indulgence instead of abstinence!

2. Satan represents vital existence instead of spiritual pipe dreams!

3. Satan represents undefiled wisdom instead of hypocritical self-deceit!

4. Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it instead of love wasted on ingrates!

5. Satan represents vengeance instead of turning the other cheek!

6. Satan represents responsibility to the responsible instead of concern for psychic vampires!

7. Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse than those that walk on all-fours, who, because of his “divine spiritual and intellectual development,” has become the most vicious animal of all!

8. Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!

9. Satan has been the best friend the Church has ever had, as He has kept it in business all these years!

Posted By: [Expletive Deleted]

I can't say I disagree, except for number 4 - everyone knows, you make a deal with the devil, you're gonna get bit. Hard. With big sulfurous fangs.

I suppose that's why I can't really agree with any of them, as an afterthought.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

4. Satan represents kindness to those who deserve it instead of love wasted on ingrates!

What this really means is kindness on the part of Satanists toward those in their world who deserve the love. Love the powerful, the strong, those who are willing to return your kindness, and those who stand as humans for themselves. The Satanic Statements being quoted do not relate to devil worship in the traditional sense. It's a religious belief based around the power of the human psyche, self, and mind. There is a bit of "magic" involved, but those who don't believe the magic bit aren't thought of as less Satanic. The imagery of magic is used as a motivation and power and focus source for the human will anyhow.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

Posted By: Rot Bottom

7. Satan represents man as just another animal, sometimes better, more often worse than those that walk on all-fours, who, because of his “divine spiritual and intellectual development,” has become the most vicious animal of all!

That is my most closely shared belief with Satanists of this stripe.

All of your other statements fundamentally contradict my beliefs, but #7 here seems to fall in sync.

However, I think you should know that despite the fact that most churches teach that humans have souls and animals do not, they do not condone abusing nature. Most of the catholics which I know are more sensitive to the natural world than many non-religious people whom I know.

Reflecting back, I'm not really sure why I wrote that little paragraph. Maybe it's because the statement would imply that because of religion, people are abusive of nature. Maybe it's because it's midnight.

How do those rules pertain to Satan?

Satanism is very akin to hedonism. It's all about doing things that return to you. For instance, don't waste love on ingrates. The idea is that if you give of yourself to somebody, you then "expect" them to give back. Of course, that's contrary to the very idea of giving. When I give something, I hardly expect it to be returned, that'd be foolish of me.

So, while I think the Satanists have some decent ideas, I don't entirely espouse all their ideas.

Oh, and don't annoy people while in their lair... isn't that exactly what Satan did in Heaven?

Sympathy for the Devil:

Once upon a time there was an all-powerful being. Following tradition we use the pronoun 'He' to refer to him. Religious believers will refer to him as God. This is inaccurate. As he differed from traditional God, for instead of being all good and benevolent, he is all bad and mean.Many may conclude I have jumped on the original God and described the fallen angel: Devil. I shall refer to him as 'Devil' but to reiterate: He is the original power, nobody created him and nothing precedes Devil. Devil is the beginning.

Devil chose to create a Universe, much like ours, of which one of the planets - Earth - was much like our own. There was England with warm beer, cricket and football; Scots cheering at English teams' frequent misses and losses. There were tigers, and tiger lilies too. There was English National Opera; porcupines frogs and cooing pigeons; and so on and so forth.

Religious texts existed also - there was the Bible and the Qur'an - as did churches and synagogues, temples and mosques, and people worshiped a great and glorious all good being. Devil tried to laugh off this mistaken worship of an almighty good God.He had deliberately arranged for the scriptures to come about as a joke, but deep down in his devilish inside, it infuriated Devil. Even the few devil-worshipers had failed to recognize him as the one almighty being.

What especially annoyed Devil was the fact that theologians, philosophers and even lay people discussed the idea of moral and natural evil and of suffering. How, given the fact that a good God ruled over them (as they mistakenly believed) could there be so much suffering and evil? Devil had reasoned that if he set the Universe going with all the evil and suffering, that reflective people would, over the years, conclude that there must be an all powerful, all evil being, namely him, Devil. They should be discussing the problem of good. Given that there is so much evidence to point to an all-powerful all bad being - Devil - the puzzle should be why good exists.

Why believe there is an all-good, all-powerful God rather than an all-bad, all-powerful Devil?

My two cents:

Posted By: Rot Bottom

Let's be honest here. If you had a boss who required you call him "Mr. Smith", even though you knew each other for a long time, would youlikehim? What if he told you he would fire you for calling him Bob? How about this - you have a spouse who says that if she found out you ever even spoke to another woman (or man) with a smile in your voice or on your face that they'd divorce you instantly? How about this: how would you feel about your parents if, while you were growing up, they beat you to bloodiness for not doing your chores or being late home one evening after playing with friends?

It's a nice metaphor, but I don't think it suffices for an argument against the belief in God. I find it clever how the metaphor finds relation in us all: most of us have had jobs, and most of us have had more than one job. The comparison from being hired to being created is not accurate in my opinion. There's an obvious difference in attitude between somebody that creates you and somebody that hires you. The difference being - there is no alternative to creation, If you were never hired you'd sit around unemployed, but what if you were never created? There's nothing you can essentially 'do' as an alternative. The same is applicable to the situation with the wife. Whilst we're on the subject of the wife - correct me if I'm misled, but I seemed to gather that you implied that God will 'divorce' you for seeking another God. Doesn't the Bible contradict this? I seem to remember Jesus saying he loves all of his brethren.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

1: "I'm more important than anything else in your world, and I'll harass and annoy and in fact destroy you if you for a moment think anyone or anything is more important than me!"

Well this is a contradiction in itself. For this to be true you'd have been either harassed, annoyed or destroyed by the big guy just for thinking that, let alone typing it. You may conclude from this that there is in fact no God, because you are not destroyed, harassed or annoyed by big G. Well that makes your entire argument futile, does it not?

Posted By: Rot Bottom

2: "I'm so important to you, that if for even a second you consider any object holds more of your attention than I do, I'll destroy you!"

Again, I'm fairly sure that Jesus says in Mark's Gospel that he loves all his brethren, regardless of their own religions or faiths. I'm sure if Christianity is correct and is the exclusive religion then all Muslims and Atheists that lead good lives will still gain membership for the pearly gates.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

3: "Never say my name unless you are addressing me or I'll kill you!"

It's all well and good to dis the commandments, but wasn't it Jesus himself that contracted the original 10 into a more important 2? Love your neighbour and love your God, ring any bells? It's possible and so very easy so love your neighbour and your God whilst simultaneously taking his name in vain.
To go back to your symbolism, if you like, we can compare this to Mr Smith's tolerance. I'm sure you've had a job where you've screwed up before. The same is with Christianity's God. If you make one minuscule mistake in your employment, you are not immediately fired. And if you make one minuscule mistake with God, you are not immediately destroyed.

And if we are: It can be used to our advantage! Consider this: When we die, if the concept of Heaven/Hell is in fact true, then traditionally our sins are weighed up against our good deeds and the remainder determines whether or not we pack our halos for Heaven or our shorts for Hell. Therefore, hypothetically, if Peter was to lead a truly great life, filled with good deeds and not a single bad deed, then if Peter was tragically run down by a bus at age 27 1/4 he would go to Heaven based on this principle. However, if Peter was almost hit by this bus, didn't die, but concluded by some reasoning that there was no God, and gave up on his good deeds, committing bad ones instead until he died at age 80, then if we assume he commits bad deeds at the same rate he committed good deeds, he's all set for a vacation to Hell. However, if, instead of reasoning that there was no God after his near death experience, he just said 'Oh my God' in shock and was instantly vaporised, he has committed one bad deed to a lifetime's Good deeds. therefore, he goes to Heaven. It's sort of like forcing a Soccer game to end when you're up by 10 points.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

Further, I believe fully that reality is more important than symbolism. The reality is, for 1800 years approximately, enslavement, wars, murders, deaths and destruction have been the only result mankind has felt from Christianity.

Do you have any backups to these claims? I'd be interested to read. I do not believe Christianity is the common denominator here, I believe it is prejudice and favour. Consider the religious wars: The ratio of wars to exclusive religious wars is favoured heavily to the left. Christianity can influence so much more than just discrimination, that's not caused by Christianity but prejudice in general.

Ok that's more like 4 cents.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

Let's be honest here. If you had a boss who required you call him "Mr. Smith", even though you knew each other for a long time, would youlikehim?

I've known my parents for over sixteen years now and I don't call them Pat and Yaromir.

Posted By: Rot Bottom

1: "I'm more important than anything else in your world, and I'll harass and annoy and in fact destroy you if you for a moment think anyone or anything is more important than me!"

2: "I'm so important to you, that if for even a second you consider any object holds more of your attention than I do, I'll destroy you!"

3: "Never say my name unless you are addressing me or I'll kill you!"

In the most extreme sense, I guess you could interpret the first three commandments this way, let me provide what I would consider a more moderate viewpoint.

1. Don't worship other gods, they are false.

2. Don't worship idols, they are material things, and only represent the being/person.
-You may ask why us Christians are allowed to place statues in our churches. The fact is, we do not worship the statues or the crosses, we worship/pray to what they represent. The Muslims, to play it safe, do not represent any people at all in their mosques.

3. Don't use my name as a colloquial term, respect it.
-For example: God Damnit!

Posted By: Rot Bottom

~3,000 years of enslavement, murder, death, destruction, rape and hatred brought about by a belief in Yahweh.

I can see where this would be coming from, and I assume that you are referring to the conquest of the holy land. Do you think that the Israelites would have invaded regardless of God's involvement? "Oh look, good land, let's take it!"

You must also consider the mentality of the people at that time. "Oh, that worked out well, it must have been God's will." or "Oh, that didn't go so well, God must have not wanted it to happen." Or to put it in context. "Oh, slaughtering all those people went well, God must have wanted it." or "That attack didn't go well, we must have sinned." God did not necessarily tell them to slaughter all those people. (That's in bold because i think it's one of the more important points.)

Posted By: Rot Bottom

committed all of 2 documented acts "against" mankind

Posted By: Rot Bottom

The only thing that has ever done more harm to mankind than mankind, is God

The Christian, or at least Catholic, teachings on Satan are not that he is some kind of being living in the center of the earth, but the overall negative force in the world, and the one who influences people to sin/be bad. If you look at the two above quotes, and consider what the teachings of the church are, it sure does look like Satan has done a whole lot of harm to mankind.