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Citation Station: Everything is bigger in Texas

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      CommentAuthorcadet
    • CommentTimeApr 20th 2006
     

    Except for penis size! I think this explains the whole attitude most Texans have that their state is better than all the rest. It is just penis envy. Sort of like guys who drive massive trucks in places like Arizona, California, Florida, etc... most of them never see anything but pavement, and the reason men drive them is to compensate for small penises. Just like the men living in the largest state in the continental US they feel that they must compensate.

    •  
      CommentAuthorUdoboy
    • CommentTimeMay 25th 2006
     

    Why is it that everytime somebody says "Everything is bigger in Texas," some idiot comes along and says something about penis size.

    Here's your compensation:
    If you have to bring up your dick in every conversation, it ain't getting no use anyhow.

    • CommentAuthorJackBauer
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006
     

    "...it ain't getting no use anyhow."

    FACT: Poor grammar is more common in southern states.
    Gullible.info: There is a direct correlation between penis size and quality of writing.

    </cadet_defense>

    •  
      CommentAuthorIllnab1024
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006 edited
     

    < rant class="shutup you idiots" id="the one that doesn't suck">
    This thread is useless, man.
    < /rant>

  5.  

    hey now, we're all friends 'round these parts :clint:

    •  
      CommentAuthorMrFingers
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006
     

    *blows a hole through leggie's cigar with his revolver*

  7.  

    *bans MrFingers*

    :owned:

    •  
      CommentAuthorMrFingers
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006
     

    aw man, I wanted to use that smilie first!

    •  
      CommentAuthorlegatissimo
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006 edited
     
    Posted By: MrFingers

    aw man, I wanted to use that smilie first!

    :owned:^2

    •  
      CommentAuthorMrFingers
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006 edited
     

    :middlefinger:

    :hfive:

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      CommentAuthorIllnab1024
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006 edited
     

    :owned: * 2^64 + God's own special kind of :owned:: Jesus!

    If you find that offensive, I am obliged to edit...

    •  
      CommentAuthorGeog
    • CommentTimeSep 10th 2006
     

    LMFAO

    It's weird how the Bible gives no physical description of Jesus, yet everybody has an idea of his apperance which don't vary much from person to person. And even all of those famous classic artists who painted Jesus also painted by that same description.

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      CommentAuthorJoshuaU490
    • CommentTimeOct 4th 2006
     

    I think if Jesus was alive today he would never make it to Amercia becasue of the airport security.

  14.  

    Geog, youre kidding , right? everyone is very few people apparently. there are many many images of jesus in different appearences and aspects. ive seen black jesus, arab jesus, hispanic jesus, fat jesus, skinny jesus, blond aryan jesus, bushy beard black haird hasidic rabbi jesus.

    just go look. theres a jesus to fit every requirements. bucket seats and convertible thorn-crowned top extra in most markets. :devil:

  15.  

    ...And let's not forget Drunk & Bitter Jesus and Jihad Jesus.

  16.  

    yeah, that yaoi with bishonen buddha was painful...

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      CommentAuthorJoshuaU490
    • CommentTimeOct 5th 2006
     

    at unencyclopedia there are tons of jesuses its kind of funny http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Jesus

    • CommentAuthorakula682
    • CommentTimeOct 7th 2006 edited
     
    Posted By: cadet

    Except for penis size! I think this explains the whole attitude most Texans have that their state is better than all the rest. It is just penis envy. Sort of like guys who drive massive trucks in places like Arizona, California, Florida, etc... most of them never see anything but pavement, and the reason men drive them is to compensate for small penises. Just like the men living in the largest state in the continental US they feel that they must compensate.

    Alaska is the largest state in the continental US, Texas is the largest state in the Contiguous US.

    Just to add a bit to the jesus talk...
    I went to a catholic school for 6 years, and I never understood why every pic of jesus was a white guy. He lived in the Middle East... that tells you what race/skin color he was (or prone to)

    i like this concept of jesus...
    http://www.jayandsilentbob.com/budchrisdass1.html
    http://www.jayandsilentbob.com/buchbo.html

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      CommentAuthorGeog
    • CommentTimeOct 8th 2006
     

    Come on, man! It's Jesus! He can be whatever damn skin colour he wants to be! Oops, it's Sunday. :shamed:

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